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Three Kinds of Sex
Attachment theory can help us understand sexuality better. In a secure attachment relationship, the three aspects of relatedness – sexuality, caregiving and attachment – are integrated. Research...
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A Quiet Revolution
A quiet revolution has happened over the last 15 years – a revolution that we all need to know about. A revolution that – at last- makes sense of romantic love. In my lab, we have now, in a landmark...
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What Inspired Me To Write Love Sense?
It might have been, wait for it, my mother’s fault! My mother was, at once, the most delightful, engaging, loving woman and the most ruthless, dominating she-wolf you could ever meet. Learning the...
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How Does Love Work?
To shape love, we have to be open and responsive, emotionally as well as physically. We can see what love encompasses in studies of the fluffy little titi monkey conducted by Bill Mason and Sally...
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Say Something I’m Giving Up On You
Sometimes … A song just gets to you. You find yourself humming it as you drive or make the coffee. “Say Something I’m giving up on you” by A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera has taken over...
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Marriage Makes A Difference To Your Brain
Marriage makes a difference to your brain – and the safety of your world. We live in a co-habiting world. Many of us do not even bother to walk down the aisle anymore. So my neuroscientist colleague...
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Is Marriage All About The Skill Set?
Do you need to hone your communication and problem solving skills to stay married? Is honing your relationship skills, such as active listening, the best way to hold onto the joy in your...
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Graduation
Watching my son graduate with his BA in Economics last week was quite a rite of passage – for all of us! A huge pride in my son – a feeling that maybe I didn’t do so badly as his mum – a gratitude...
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Revitalize: How to Love Intelligently
Just back from the MindBodyGreen REVITALIZE summit in beautiful Tucson, Arizona – two days of amazing and inspirational talks on wellness. Both days were packed with wellness experts. I spoke on How...
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Pride
For lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people and their supporters, June marked a month of celebration and pride. All over the globe communities shared their support with beautiful parades,...
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Christmas & Connection
Christmas is all about togetherness and family. But some of us find ourselves alone at Christmas. At times like this, it seems like everyone in the world BELONGS, except you. One of the best...
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Article 0
In this New Year, fifteen years into the new century, I hope that in this year, we learn to deal better with how we hurt and injure each other. I hope that we move not just into forgiveness, but...
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Love is a Dance
There are only so many dances in a love relationship. The happier we are, the more fluid and varied the dance with our partner is. We feel safe together so we improvise and play. But do you notice...
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Vulnerability & Monogamy
Suddenly it seems as if everyone is having to defend monogamy. To defend the idea that love with a long time familiar partner can be just as erotic and passionate as a one night stand. Passion is...
View ArticleThe Gift of Hope
Last week saw a truly momentous event in world history. We must pay exquisite attention to this. We must hold it up and sing about it. A Charleston church community, after many decades of oppression...
View ArticleTALK as a Turn On
Having just come back from the June Sex and Attachment conference in NYC, I was thinking about how we go for the sensational and the exotic in our public conversations and miss the obvious simple down...
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Article 3
Any researcher knows that, if you aspire to be an ‘objective’ scientist, you are not allowed to be passionately impressed by your own research. I am now going to break that rule. It seems...
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Article 2
We have a new ten minute video for everybody. Dr Ed Tronick – one of the foremost experts in how babies interact with their mothers to build loving bonds, came to visit me in Ottawa on a wintery...
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Article 1
A secure bond is NOT just feeling familiar with someone and knowing that you can turn to them when you are troubled and need support. A secure bond is deeper than this. All the research says that...
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Attachment and the Dance of Sex: Integrating Couple and Sex Therapy
NETWORKER SYMPOSIUM: FROM ATTACHMENT TO CREATIVITY / WASHINGTON DC. – TEXT OF PLENARY BY DR SUE JOHNSON – Attachment and the Dance of Sex – Integrating Couple and Sex Therapy We are just going to...
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